Time, Motivation, Reason

Time, Motivation, Reason

Sometimes, there isn't much of a justification for some of the things I do. A good example is the newest release of Crime Reaper for macOS.

I've had access to an Apple laptop since at least 2016 (thank you Toni <3), and I previously supported a Mac version of Thunder Gun: Revenge of the Mutants with that same laptop. Because we live in 2022, making a Unity build for Mac computers is pretty trivial; I spent about 30 minutes installing crap on a laptop and 5 minutes building the damn thing. The next day, I spent an hour remembering how to update listings on Steam and itch.io (not Game Jolt, but I have other reasons for that) and ta-da, it was done.

NOW, why did I procrastinate and not do this for about 12 months since the original release?

I think it's because I had about one part not having time, one part not having motivation, and one part not enough reason.


I was busy working on contracts in the last year, starting almost immediately after Crime Reaper shipped. It was for two really cool projects, but the time investment left me exhausted and unable to work on any of my own personal work. This time usage lasted about 9 months. So Time really is the majority of why I didn't make this Mac port, but it's also the most straightforward, so I don't have much to add outside of this.


So after the bigger of the two contracts finished, I had free-reign once again to work on my own projects. I was excited to start on something new but I had really poor motivation going on for about 3 months. My best guess was this was burnout, medication issues, or both.

First, I was going to make a spiritual successor to Super Space Rogues called Cargoteers — a project that had been brewing in my mind for a year or so. It was going to be more of a management heavy game which is something outside of my comfort zone development-wise, but was exciting because I knew Super Space Rogues was its own little hit when I made it. Rogues had legs!

But after I waffled over SEVEN iterations of Cargoteers and its basic premise, I felt like the magic was gone. I didn't want to work on it any more; I couldn't see my way past its flaws.

I moved on to something else, a moon-shot of an idea to get my feet wet in multiplayer games: Tank Game. Tank Game was very straightforward; no servers were going to be needed, you could just run as a host from your own client and get online with your friends and play some turn based strategy. This game also grew old, and it did so in an even quicker way than Cargoteers. Less time wasted, but wasted none-the-less.

My last attempt was working on project Empire — another space-based game where you managed an evil empire trying to take over the stars. I didn't grow tired of it, I just ran out of money again and had to throw in the towel before I got 2 months into it.


Finally, I didn't really have a reason to approach a Mac port for Crime Reaper. There were maybe 10 requests to have a Mac compatible version of the game, but the time where I could reasonably serve those requests is long gone; I'm not sure the people who asked still even remember the game.

The modern games space doesn't have the greatest channels in notifying people that new products that they said they wanted exist. I replied to all of the itch comments and made big broadcasts on both Steam and itch that this new version was ready, but what's the chance people had opted-in to seeing these messages unless they already bought the game? Pretty low.

So since I already used so much time since release not making this port, it's safe to say it's not going to do much for me in the way of making money. I can hope that maybe if I decide to make a sequel for Crime Reaper people who (when I LAUNCH with a Mac version this time) buy the new one they might also buy the old one to complete their collection or something.


I don't really know why I'm making this post. Part of it is because I feel guilty for being quiet, the other is that I'm hoping that after my next contract is over, I can make something really cool again, and the post will be some sort of pre-acknowledgement of my limited time to make the things I want to make.

My eternal struggle will be trying to find these opportunities to make stuff. Probably always too late, probably always too slowly.